Canadian Celebrates Messy Divorce After Her Husband Did The Unspeakable

WITH a cheeky grin, Sarah Harper sliced into her divorce cake — then chopped
the head off the icing groom.

The woman was celebrating her freedom at an expensive divorce party
and there wasn’t a tear in sight.

Instead, the local bar was filled with dancing, laughter and a $1000 eight-tier
divorce cake.

With so much celebration, glitz and glamour, it was hard to believe that this was a celebration of the messy break up of a marriage!

But the events leading up to the break up revealed a story you could never have imagined.

Returning home from work one afternoon Sarah received a written note from her then husband which said:


Dear Sarah,

I'm writing to tell you that I’m leaving you.

I’ve been a good man to you for 6 years now and have nothing to show.

Recently the last weeks have been awful. Your boss called me and told me you had quit your job. Why didn’t you tell me!?

Then last week you didn’t even notice I had had my haircut, or care about the the meal I had cooked for you and brand new underwear I wore for you.

You just did what you always do. Watch your tv and then go to bed.

You never tell me you love me and we never sleep together anymore. It doesn’t feel like we are husband and wife! Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me. But it doesn’t matter. It’s over.


Your EX-Husband

P.S. Don’t try and find me. We never expected it would happen but I fell in love with your sister. We’ll be moving in together. It’s probably best you stay away.

Little did he know that Sarah would have the perfect response.


Dear Ex-Husband,

You’ve just made my day. Thanks for your letter! Yes we’ve been married a long time but a good man is a stretch from what you are!

I watch tv to drown out your constant moaning. Call yourself a man? You need to grow a pair!

Of course I noticed your haircut last week but the first thing that came into my head was that you looked like a girl! My mum always said to not saying anything at all if I had nothing nice to say… That’s why I decided to keep quiet!

So you cooked my favorite meal? That’s interesting! Because I stopped eating pork years ago. Perhaps you’re getting me confused with my sister?

And about those new boxers… I turned away from you because you’d left the tag on them still. I was praying it’s just a coincidence that my sister had lent $50 off me earlier that day. I guess now I know the truth.

Anyway – after all this I still loved you and felt we could work it out. So a couple of weeks ago when I hit a jackpot for $2 million, quit my job and brought us two round the world holiday tickets I thought you would be happy. But by the time I had come to surprise you were already gone!

So I guess everything does happen for a reason… I hope you live a great life. I know I will. And my lawyer tells me thanks to your letter it ensures me you won’t be getting a cent from me.

Take care!


Your EX-Wife – much happier, richer and care free!


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